i like to read and write about stuff: 2019

smell my ass (poem)

i think, "smell my ass"
to the landlord i think is mean
i'm a pacifist and also a pussy, i care
about my plants more than people
that is insane
i feel awful if i don't leave the house
if i do leave
i buy a beer and cheeseburger
and eat it sadly because i paid money
to kill myself

i do the same things as other people
but i think i do them better
i wish i never went to college
i wish i had a list my dad could've given
me of all the books i read in college
to save me money
all anyone ever needs is a library card
when i go to the library
i like to sit by the largest window
i can find
to feel both inside and outside
at once
which is how i always try to be
inside and outside

here i go again!
writing a whole damn poem all about myself
again

: ' )

blH BLh BLh BLAH BLAH blah blah blah blah

this is what 'm loooking at rn:::

GODDAMN

I promise it's not that goddamn oppressive

from my POV it doesnt look like

sucha fucking prison

the sky is BLUUUUUEEEEEEEEEEE

and.....BOY.....i sure am sick and tired of waiting for emails to send

U wont believe the morning i've had

ON the Lord's Day?

.....ooops

..........i forget .......

: ' (((((

asdfasdf asdfasdf

as fasdads sas dad

BUT LEMME TELL U

i'VE looked at my phhhhooo0OOONnne

I've BEEN*singing* onnnnLIIIIIINNNNNNEEEEE
i've sat on the toliet approx 3-5 times
i haven't shat once
NOT ONCE
and only dribbled some piss
now i'm sitting on the floor because i can no longer be asleep
i'm sitting on the floor because i have no where to sit
i'm sitting on the floor because i like it
i'm sitting on the floor because that's how i've always done my writing
and i wont' changed that now!

I learned that the crust of the Earth is approx. 3-5 miles thick and is only about 1% of the planet's total volume.

I learned that the best sleeping position is shoving a pillow up your ass and passing out due to exhaustion.

This is ridiculous

and you wanna no the saddest thing?

*whispers*

THIS IS ALL TRUUUUUUUUU

I'm spending all this money ...

LOL jk i dont have any money

and if i did

yeah
drugs

LOL jk

i dont do drugs anymore

except all the bad ones

i watched bologona sandwich video

on Youtube for like an hour before going to bed and truly felt like i understood

what it feels like to eat a bologna sandwich

culd you imaigne what it'd be like if your coworkers found out about all your mukbang vids?

i hope hthey wouldn't take it as a come-on

....................

...........

......

....

.what fi they read your blog?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

!!!!
?

you think i'd give a shit>?

no way jose

i know youre reading this, jose

bastard''

these are hieroglyphics for a new age

what the techno-nomads will discover upon

buried under a saguro in the sonora desert

i see cats all night long

and the thumping bass of some distant song

without genre

outside in the picture describes

two palms trees

on close and the other more distant

through the blinds this morning

one soliditary plant resides next to the window

taking in what little sun

there is to offer today

but before we know it will be the afternoon

and people will have entered and re-entered buildings

burgers flipped

highways

driven

at home they will turn on the television

lava

fissures of earth cracking through like pimples

inside will feel so safe

the ticker underneath the news anchor

will appear alien and undecipherable

as hot air pressurizes the room

i'M READY TO RETURN TO PLANET EARTH

THIS TIME AS A GOOD BOY

THIS TIME WITH MY BACK CORRECTED

MY PILLOW ALL THE WAY IN

I'M READY TO BE ONE WITH WHATEVER

THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE

Disney camera

i bought this old disney digital camera at goodwill.
here is its product listing on amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Digital-Blue-Disney-3-0MP-Camera/dp/B00325U78K

it's a shitty camera: 3 megapixels, 4x optical zoom; not much going on in terms of specs, EXCEPT, this feature where you can overlay overlay these graphics onto your photos before you take them. so you can pose with mickey mouse or donald duck or whoever. it makes for a charming little camera actually.

the camera must have been previously owned by a child, given all the pictures of toys and cats, and i found a number of photos still in the memory card. here are some of them for your enjoyment.